I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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