She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Randomize
