Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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