we're blogging at a bar
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Randomize
