with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
