I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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