there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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