i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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