i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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