her vagine was all disorganized.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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