I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
I want her autograph on my taint
I will be naked everywhere
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize
