I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
