i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
