Do vagina's smell?
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Randomize
