I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
