Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
did i just pee glitter
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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