And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Randomize
