he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Randomize
