Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
