she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
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