JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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