What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Randomize
