Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I stole a fireplace last night.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize