absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
