I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Randomize