i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
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