And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
