when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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