i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Randomize