there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
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