So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize
