he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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