Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
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