i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
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