There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
