Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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