Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
