also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
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