The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
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