I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Randomize
