Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
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