hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
