In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
