69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
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