Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Randomize
