Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize