I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
