I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize