Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
