hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
it hurts more in the daytime
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
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