I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Randomize
