real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Randomize
